A personal testimony:
Shedding daily tears of repentance and love,
that we may build a world of peace...

by Chantal Masuda
Friday, June 28, 2002

Chaju Guk! Dear Brothers and Sisters, Blessed Central Families of the Unification Community,

* Recently, Abonim has started using "Chaju Guk" -autonomous nation- as a new greeting.

I would like to share with you something I recently found. Something about the Spirit World and the reason why I believe Abonim has been speaking so much about it lately.

Before, just a few months ago, I could not understand why Abonim was speaking so much about the Spirit World, especially since God's Coronation Day...

In Cheong Pyeong Lake Hoon Mo Nim told us that if we do not work properly together with our ancestors, when we go back home, we were going to be in serious trouble.

Well, I think we tasted the fulfillment of this warning on September 11, didn't we?

Abonim did say that September 11 happened "because", since the Coronation Day, we, Blessed Central families, have not fulfilled our responsibility. Sometimes we might think that we have worked hard because we invested ourselves in some campaign, the best we knew how ... investing our time, money, prayers, and skills, but because the result didn't come as we would have like it to come, or as Abonim told us it would if we give 100% of our effort, we find some excuses for ourselves by saying that we were paying indemnity.

Does this sound familiar?

In reality, result has not been coming because we are missing the central point of it all: what Abonim has been telling us again, again and again. Abonim puts it in many different kind of words, in many forms, but now I am finding out that what he is speaking about is always the same one central point.

  1. Abonim tells us to "unite our mind and body".
  2. He tells us to bring unity between the Spirit World and the Physical World.
  3. He tells us to work with our ancestors.
  4. He tells us to bring unity between the Spirit World Blessed Families and the Physical World Blessed Families.
  5. He tells us to find the zero point where we can meet God, to go back there every day.
  6. He tells us to live in absolute faith, absolute love, and absolute obedience .... how do we do that?
  7. He tells us to change our name: this looks a little easier! .... may-be ...
  8. He tells us to shed tears .... Tears? Tears? How?

    This sounds so many things to do, doesn't it?

    But you know, my dear brothers and sisters, I understand now that this is all the same one unique thing. It all comes back to the same.

    And it is not that complicated. It is, in fact, quite simple actually. Very simple!.

  9. I found out that the fulfillment of all these seemingly impossible tasks starts in one place, one unique place and that place is the place of repentance.

The place where we repent so sincerely and so much that we shed tears ... many, many, many tears for all the sins we know: our own personal sins, our family sins, our national sins, historical sins, America's sins ....

When we can repent that much with so many tears that they become "endless" -- because we feel that we can never cry enough -- we are finding all the other areas of victory at the same time: our mind and body are completely united into one.

We find the tearful wretched Heart of God ( the zero point ).

We find Abonim's heart and we begin to "understand" him.... Why? Because that is the way he has been living all his life...

Furthermore, when we are shedding tears of repentance for Heaven and Earth, our Spirit World brothers and sisters are attracted .

They come to us and shed tears with us.

What use to be a concept (the Spirit World ) becomes a reality!

We actually feel, sense, and sometimes even "see" our SpW brothers and sisters.

We find out that they are normal people like us and they want to cry together with us ..... and suddenly they are guiding us much more than before .... all kind of events start popping up in our life that we obviously recognize as coming from our SpW B&S.

Not once in a while, but every day, every single day, day in and out.

Also, in tears of love for others, we "meet" Abonim!

Not only we find him in the depth of our heart, but he also comes to us in amazing, surprising, unexpected, unforgettable ways (not dreams ).

In tears, we find our spouse's "true" heart, and our children's.

The beginning of new hope for our Blessed Central Families, to finally make it right after so many years where we have been wondering if the ideal of marriage will remain only a dream.... no! the droplets of love melt barriers between husband and wife, parents and children. This has been my experience these last 6 months. Ask Masahide, my husband! He might not be able to pinpoint what has happened but he is sure appreciative of the results...

This place of tears is where we feel "True Life", and "True Love".

It is the place of "absoluteness", where we find "absolute faith, absolute love and absolute obedience" in endless tears of repentance for Heaven and Earth!

If I were to compare my life "before" and "after" becoming able to shed, each and every day, tears of repentance and tears of love for God and others, I would say it is the difference between death ... and life.

I was dead and I am becoming alive!

I was blind and I am beginning to see ...

I was confused and I am starting to understand ...

Before, I was looking for something .... that I could not find ...

Before, I was trying to wash my dirty clothes, my dirty dishes ..... without water.

Before, I was trying to cultivate my garden ..... without water Tears! This Holy Water coming out of our eyes, running down our cheeks are washing our sins, all these sins we are struggling with in our daily lives, sticking to us stronger than glue, living in our blood, suffocating us at times .... these bad spirits leave us when "we" "stick" to repentance .... why? because low spirits do not like repentance, true real repentance in tears ... thus they leave us.... and when we continue to repent each and every day in tears.... these unwanted spirits cannot come back .... does this sound like bringing Cheong Pyeong Lake into our daily life?

I am not saying it is easy to melt in endless tears of love for God and others; no, it is not easy, but there is no other way.

Abonim says that if there was another way, he would have found it.

It is difficult .... but how worthy! And how tasty!

How wonderful it is to find true life and true love.

To find others, any others as my very own brothers and sisters.

To start shedding tears when we read the newspaper, because that man going to jail is "my" own brother .... and I am starting to cry .... is this not normal?

Abonim said: "if you do not shed tears when your own brother is going to jail, what kind of person are you?"

Why is it so important to invite our Spirit World Brothers and Sisters to work together with us, in unity?

Because if we don't "The world will become a pile of rubble, like an unattended grave, ... if we do not pray for it to be saved even at the expense of our own life." June 21, 2002

Well, my dear and precious Brothers and Sisters of the Unification Community, I wanted to share this with you.

I hope you didn't find it too boring ....

I hope ....

Choong Mo ( this is my new new name I was getting too comfortable with Yong Ho Moon which I switched to six months ago. I needed another change of name, to shake my comfortable and apathetic spirit world :-)

It is also a way to see who my true friends are! :-) just kidding!

June 28, 2002

P.S. For those of you who do not know, I used to be called Chantal Masuda, which remains only as a legal name.

I copied below some excerpts from recent Abonim's speeches supporting the points I brought up in this letter. There are "many" other references we can find all over Father's words in many speeches, especially in the June 21, 2002 speech.

  1. "Again the unity of mind and body is the key ...." January 27, 2002 "We must unify our mind and body and turn over 180 degrees; then we can go to unify. If we do not unite our mind and body, information will come to us but we will not absorb it and really know it."

    "...Have no quarrel of mind and body: absolutely understand this." April 5, 2002

  2. "You must know the spirit world directly, and you relationship with it. You must know your direct relationship with the will of God." ( May 29 - June 2, 2001)
  3. "Please remember that you should be able to mobilize your ancestors....." October 8, 2002

    "To receive them ( the Spirit World, ancestors ) our mind and body, husband and wife and parents and children have to be absolutely one. Then they can come down freely and work with and through us ..... " October 8, 2001

  4. "So, in this era now, the physical world and spirit world couples should embrace and be united as elder and younger, beginning on the individual level. Again this is an engrafting process ...." October 8, 2001

    "All the blessed couples in the spirit world and on earth should work together.... " January 27, 2002

    "How different you are from those in the spirit world, God and all Saints. You should connect to them....." April 4, 2002

    "Today begins a new tradition of those who can totally unite the physical world, the spirit world and your ancestors." April 5, 2002

  5. "We have to secure the zero point and, when necessary, go back there for a new start. The zero point is where you may have the chance to find God." January 31
  6. "The best way is absolute faith, love and obedience. If you are able to live such an exemplary life, then spirit world will belong to you..... " October 8, 2001
  7. "In order to make the total living offering, we have to be able to erase our own name."

    "We need to receive new names .... I don't want to see even a shadow of Satan." January 27, 2002

    "Who gave you your name, your father or God? Your physical parents gave you your name, and we have to negate it." January 31, 2002

  8. "If you are united with my heart, you will be in tears when you pray, even as a man, missing me." January 27, 2002

    "I shed tears in prayer as a condition to return heaven and earth." January 27, 2002

    "..... If you truly understand Divine Principle, as man when you pray you will miss True Father with tears." January 27, 2002 "Even men should cry and weep missing Father" April 4, 2002

  9. "You have to repent for the sake of yourself and your nation." January 27, 2002

    "You should love Rev. Moon more than you love God. Do you? If not, you should repent so much." April 4, 2002

    "I wait until they repent and make a heartfelt pledge after realizing for themselves how wayward their lives on earth were." Heung Jin Nim, God's Day 2002